Due to high traffic levels at FTR I am implementing a reader schedule that should help with the bandwidth load. Please memorize your visit times and only visit FTR during those times. This will save those readers who had to view the page above today from having to wait until we bumped the BW up to 100000 M.
Visitation Schedule for Friday Traffic Report
- If your last name begins with A-K, please visit FTR on Mondays after 11 pm and Tuesday between 9 a.m. and 9:30 a.m.
- If your last name begins with L-M-N-O or P, please visit the FTR every other Thursday between 5 p.m. and 7 a.m.
- If you were born between the years 1968-1986, please only visit the FTR on Saturday mornings after the “Crocodile Hunter Diaries” airs on Discovery Channel.
- If you are between 5′ 11″ and 6′ 2″ in height and weigh between 100-214 pounds, please visit the Friday Traffic Report on the third Sunday of each month and every other Wednesday if it is an odd-numbered date.
Anyone caught reading FTR on a day or time they are not scheduled for above will be smited or even smote.
Tips For Conserving Bandwidth
1. If you read something you don’t understand, please don’t read it again as if that’s going to make any difference.
2. Try to read the whole blog in one session. This way you won’t have to come back for awhile until I post another 1000 stories or so.
3. Read FTR with friends. Instead of IMming a link to FTR to your friends, invite them over for an FTR party and read from just one browser.
4. Please don’t quote or link to the FTR blog as it brings more and more people here which chews up more and more bandwidth and I already have too many problems with that as it is.
5. If you absolutely must link to FTR, please only link to it every other day instead of recklessly leaving a link to me up 24/7 on your site!
Remember, bandwidth is a finite resource and we should all be doing everything we can to conserve it.
Tips For Conserving Your Own Bandwidth
1. Try not to update your site too much. People and search engines like that and will run over to your site every time you publish something new.
2. Do not write about topics that get a lot of searches. Again, the engines will find your content and expose it to their users. Sometimes you could end up in the top 10 results for a popular keyword. If this happens, immediately call Google and ask them to take your site out of the results or suffer serious bandwidth drainage.
3. Don’t use pictures or videos. People like to read a lot on the web and don’t want time saving or entertaining multi-media to get in the way of their quest for the written word.
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Hi,
a nice humorous tips for traffic conservation
I will definitely use them.
Do you use an output compression feature of your blog ?
Svetoslav
http://seofilter.com
http://devcha.blogspot.com
I have printed your site and are now making lots of copies to share all around.
Hope that helps with your bandwidth. :o)
Hey Jack, I love it. The doctors tell us it’s good for us to laugh and I laughed till I cried.
On the more serious side, well done with your blog. I’m sure you’re chewing up more resources than the rest of us combined!
At first, I wasn’t sure if this was a joke or if you were being serious, but after awhile I decide to go ahead and laugh
Is that screenshot above and actual image of your FireFox installation? If so, how long does it take to actually load the browser when you first start it? Also, has having all of those tool bars and buttons and thing a ma jigs that are taking up all of your browsing real estate effected the way you browse web sites?